Below are the most recent 25 friends' journal entries.

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Friday, December 11th, 2009
musesfool	12:36p	rested and longing for motion Good lord, I tried to do a spot of online Christmas shopping, since Boss 1 is gone for the day and Boss 2 is in a three hour conference call, and the phones will not stop ringing! And when the phones aren't ringing, people are stopping by! WTF? It's Friday! Give me fifteen minutes of peace so I can order some gifts! *rant about international shipping and the lack thereof from some sites redacted* Speaking of Christmas, I don't send holiday cards anymore - I got out of the habit and never got back into it, so I never put my name in anymore for people to send me cards, since I feel bad that I don't reciprocate. I do love receiving cards, though, so thank you so much to rei_c for the lovely card! First one of the season! *hearts* *** Last night, mosca posted a poem in breathe_poetry that I really liked (Different Uses for Windows by Arlene Ang), and included a link to H_NGM_N, the literary journal in which it appears, so of course I had to go over there and poke around. I found this poem: Fifteen Beautiful Colors by Erica Bernheim I. Four mornings in a row of dawns, reversed sunsets, greasepaint reflections of peril heightened. II. Ash, scattered, tastes of care and warns of inter-mural collisions. Expected, their flat hues. III. Speaker, formulaic, blends all domestics into hard-won remainders like salt and rock salt. IV. Lights at their brightest are the first to be extinguished. Six tickets rigged. Stained clandestine yellow. V. Signals, misfired. Cornflower becomes alabaster, what voices scrape the self-professed neutron into action. VI. Sweets, water, rested and longing for motion, the completion of the voiced projections: picture, abandon. VII. My love, this journey and you have worn me like a jacket, like bluish seams erased and easily worn out. VIII. Comfortable lead, pulling from center together, narrow as spit rope. Forty bowls, none glass. IX. No one cares for the plights of the professionals, their amber sweat, their safety is what this does for you. X. This is what the conversation looks like when no one wants to have it. Someone keeps score in red. XI. Dead pull hitter. No trigger. Even the handle has been sold. What remains, iron. XII. Two arms reaching make little sound grasps at smoke. Nothing here will bloom or rise, planetary faces. XIII. Ball into glove is to tincture as impact was to need. Precious intensity wheedles its own sins. XIV. Fine and ground to pieces no bigger than the heart of palm that holds yours. Waves out, be mine. XV. What is this moon but silver ending, this flesh but nothing, this lamp, this stiff night. ~*~ I liked the first poem on the page well enough to scroll down and keep reading this one, and I liked it too, even though it didn't really ping me. Interesting use of language, and the first sentence of IV is well put, but nothing to really jolt me until I hit this: VII. My love, this journey and you have worn me like a jacket, like bluish seams erased and easily worn out. How perfect is that? It packs a whole relationship into one line, twenty words long, nothing tricky about it, deceptively simple. You know exactly what kind of jacket she's talking about, and exactly what the narrator feels like. This is why I love poetry and why I wish I could write like a poet. (It also doesn't hurt that it makes me think of Sam and Dean. Shut up.) And X. reminds of fandom. Sigh. *** This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/105339.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: cranky Current Music: Grown So Ugly - the Black Keys (Comment on this)
Thursday, December 10th, 2009
yourlibrarian	10:41p	A heartwarmer for the holidays I rarely look around YouTube, but when I stumbled over this tonight I suspected many on my cat-loving flist would want to see it as well. A lovely vid of firefighters saving (quite a few) cats from a fire. (Comment on this)
musesfool	3:58p	she's just someone's favorite daughter Thank you to pinkfinity and regala_electra for the lovely v-gifts. ♥ * \o/ Three sets of minutes done! Well, not done-done, because they still have to be reviewed/revised etc. but the hardest part is done and the first drafts are now in the hands of the appropriate staff members for editing. Woo! * Apparently I'm now famous in fleurdeleo's office because I gave her half the baked goods I made last weekend and she brought them into work and they were a big hit. I brought in the cheesecake to my office today for the potluck luncheon (which is in lieu of a holiday party? I don't even know), and the funny thing is, yesterday, a number of people asked me if I were bringing something in today - I guess the blueberry cake and the banana cake made an impression. Heh. Winning the world over with baked goods - a sound strategy. The people I sat with during the luncheon liked the cake, so that was a winner. Someone actually asked me if I ever made grain pie, and I was able to say I have, and then someone else recommended Veniero's grain pie, which recommendation I totally seconded. I'm full of a lot of food - there was pulled pork and brisket and ribs and pierogies and chicken with string beans (too spicy!) and mac and cheese and a dozen other things I didn't even get to because I was so full with what was on my plate. Boss 2 made pineapple rum punch and I had a half a glass of that as well. And for dessert, a piece of cheesecake (I made it! I had to taste it!*), a chocolate mini-cupcake, a bite of apple crisp, and a half slice of flan. Everything was very good, but I totally want to curl up and go to sleep now. FOOOOOOD COMAAAAAAAA. So I mentioned that I decided I would bake for Christmas gifts for the adults in the family - there are four couples I usually buy for, and this seems like a cheaper, more personal gift (and also easier than trying to figure out what to get them either as individuals or couples). Of course, I had to listen to a harangue from my dad about it, as he mansplained why he thought I shouldn't do it, and just buy gift cards instead (is there a special subcategory for dadsplaining? because I think he does it to my brother, too). I was like, I'm not twelve years old and I have thought it through and it's totally workable, especially if I do most of the baking in their somewhat larger and more counter-space-having kitchen (plus! an industrial size KitchenAid stand mixer! Woo! *is mad jealous of that*). So we had one of those "I'm at work and can't yell at you like I'd like to so I'll speak in furious hushed tones on the phone" arguments the other day and the upshot is that I am baking for Christmas, but I am also taking an extra day off to do so (my boss was all, "that's fine - nothing is going on 12/23 anyway"). I won't even go into the way my mother makes me crazy sometimes, and specifically how she did so yesterday, because arrgh! *deep calming breaths* I love my parents, but dear god, the can be infuriating sometimes. ANYWAY. I ordered a springform pan to be sent to their house since they don't have one and I don't want to lug mine from home, and I also ordered these star-shaped bake and give paper pans from King Arthur Flour. Anyone ever use them? It seems like a great idea, but do they really hold up in the oven? I guess I will find out. I don't think they're good for cheesecake though, hence the springform. I also took care of my nieces' gifts yesterday - the boys just get Best Buy gift certificates these days - so I feel much more on top of things than I did earlier. Heh. I love Christmas shopping and I'm good at picking out gifts for people, but the past few years have been harder - I don't seem to get much in the way of Christmas spirit until it's much later than is wise to start shopping. Doing a lot online helps, and walking past the trees being sold on the sidewalk always perks me up, but still, I miss being more excited about the holidays. So I was thinking of redoing my delicious tags regarding food - right now that's the only tag I use for anything food-related. When I started, I didn't think there would be much - the online menus of a couple of restaurants I order from, some food-related gift ideas, and that's it - but clearly there is more than that. I bookmark more recipes these days than stories (which is a whole other rant I won't subject you to), so I am thinking I should maybe differentiate a little to make things easier to find. Maybe food: recipes: [type of recipe, i.e., meat, pasta, dessert, etc.], food: information, food: menus? Hmmm... I wrote most of this post earlier, before the luncheon and now I am too brain dead to remember if there was anything else I wanted to say, so I'll just hit post. -- *I don't taste the things I don't like to eat, even when I've cooked them myself - I am a very finicky, unadventurous eater. When I used to cook regularly for the family I often made things I don't eat, but I wouldn't have brought something like that in for strangers, anyway. *** This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/105072.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: full Current Music: Chinese Burn - Curve (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 9th, 2009
stele3	9:55p	Oh well, what the hell. If I came with a warning label, what would it say? Just out of morbid curiosity. ***** So, the Adam Lambert segment on Barbara Walters special about the 10 Most Fascinating People of the Year. Short? Disappointing? What the hell was that? I did get one good laugh out of it when Babs talked about when Adam "came out" in Rolling Stone, "shocking absolutely no one." Preach it, Babs. The dude wasn't hiding a damn thing. ***** Ugh, ugh, *scours the 'net for the latest episode of Glee* C'mon, bitches, I need my Kurt fix! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
musesfool	11:13p	you might find you get what you need My hair is thick and knots if you look at it funny, so for years I've used a detangler or leave-in conditioner - usually Infusium 23. I ran out and they didn't have any in the CVS in my neighborhood, so I bought this L'Oreal leave-in conditioner gel, and it says on the bottle that it smells like rosemary and mint. Maybe in BIZARRO WORLD. It smells more like the backseat of a Cutlass owned by a guy named Joey Bones in 1986. After it's been locked up tight on a 90° day. Ugh. Works really well, but makes my hands stink of nothing that resembles rosemary, mint or any combination of the two. Sigh. I'll use it, I suppose, but I am going back to Infusium after this. It doesn't have a horrible smell. * So my LJ comments have started slowly trickling in. Yay? I'm glad I didn't post any fic during this time of no notifications. I made a cheesecake tonight to take to work tomorrow. Hopefully it came out as good as the one I made Saturday. It looks good and smells good. Sadly, my oven was not big enough for me to put the cake pan in a hot water bath, so the top cracked. (The largest pan my oven fits is a 9x13", but a 9" springform does not fit in that.) Then I watched Criminal Minds. ( spoilers ) Then I watched Glee. I tried to dl some of the songs from tonight, but iTunes tells me something is being modified and therefore I cannot. But I really liked ( song spoilers ) * I'm done with two sets of minutes and 3/4 of the way through the last set, and then hopefully I can actually do some work on my yuletide story at work. That would be good. I still have the same 73 words I had on Saturday. Sigh. I used to be good at this writing thing. What the hell happened? Possibly baking is my new fandom? I was an enthusiastic baker when I was younger and I've enjoyed rediscovering it, and I am more squeeful about it than I am about fandom these days. Hmm... Speaking of which, I need to go unfrock my cheesecake, and then I am going to bed. * This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/104750.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: People Got a Lotta Nerve - Neko Case (2 Comments |Comment on this)
stele3	5:21p	Drumming diary: Mr. Brightside II I'm gonna be giving myself another week on this one - it's a complex song, and I've just realized that I've got change up the sticking in order to play the sixteenth notes fast enough. At 140 bpm, there's no way I'll be able to play sixteenth notes while single-sticking it, so I'm going to double-stick and roll all of those notes. 'Double-sticking' is when you loosen your hold on the sticks and allow them to bounce on the drum head (or in this case, the hit-hat). The secondary hit, obviously, is not as powerful, but there's just no way I can move my limbs fast enough to single-stick those sections. That will make it tricky to hit the snare just once on 2 and 4, but I'll have to train my hand to switch back and forth. It also means I've got to retrain my limbs to play the verses, then match the rest of the song to that faster tempo. Once I get the verses (and the breaks, the breaks are kind of tricky) down, the rest of the song should be easy. *knock on wood* (1 Comment |Comment on this)
yourlibrarian	5:13p	Media Studies 2.0 I picked up a rec for this from veni_vidi_vids and have to agree that this is one of the best series vids for Queer as Folk I've yet seen. I love the way the various characters get their moments and there's a real feeling of the large ensemble that made up this cast. If you haven't seen it yet, check out Unconditional by dreamrequiem. Wow, are we having a winter storm here. Barely any snow as of yet but I couldn't sleep this morning from the force of the wind outside rattling the building. It's even distracting me now that I'm awake, and we had to go rescue some of the balcony Christmas stuff already. I'm just really glad I don't have to go catch a bus today. I've posted the following to sim_studies but also wanted to include it here.( Read more... ) (Comment on this)
poisontaster	2:29p	Fic: Outtake: Jeremy Fandom: CWRPS Pairing: Jeffrey Dean Morgan/Jeremy Sisto Rating: Adult Warnings: Slave fic. Themes of mental illness/hospitalization. Implied sex between an adult and a minor (17). Disclaimer: This is in no way a true story. Word Count: 2,300 AN: An excerpt from the A Kept Boy universe. ( I just want Jeremy to be okay. ) Current Mood: blah (Comment on this)
poisontaster	2:29p	Fic: Outtake: Jeremy Fandom: CWRPS Pairing: Jeffrey Dean Morgan/Jeremy Sisto Rating: Adult Warnings: Slave fic. Themes of mental illness/hospitalization. Implied sex between an adult and a minor (17). Disclaimer: This is in no way a true story. Word Count: 2,300 AN: An excerpt from the A Kept Boy universe. ( I just want Jeremy to be okay. ) Current Mood: blah (Comment on this)
stele3	10:57a	*raises eyebrow at Huffington Post* Huh. I posted my open letter to Jennifer Vanasco in the comments of her blog article over 24 hours ago. The Huffington Post staff have yet to allow them to be posted. (Comments are moderated.) Huh. *sips tea* Pardon me while I'm deeply unimpressed by a supposedly left-wing newspaper, and the free press in general. (9 Comments |Comment on this)
musesfool	10:44a	and this emptiness in my heart Still no comment notifications (even recent comments is running slow), but I am neck deep in minutes, and need some entertainment, so, a meme, gacked from cereta: If I came with a warning label, what would it say? *** This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/104462.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: busy Current Music: but whichever way i go i come back to the place you are (Comment on this)
stele3	12:47a	This is what I get for fooling around on the Internet Did anyone else notice Tom Conrad's picture of William Beckett's spread legs on the "Sex Is Not The Enemy" blog? Right here. (Note: that picture is SFW. Most of the others linked below are not.) I'm presuming that someone in the fandom sent it in...I've seen this blog making the rounds on my flist. If not, and Tomrad reads SINTE, then......yeah, I can't think of a proper response. If you're not reading this feed, you should be. There's all kinds of beautiful, sexy, strange, and just plain amazing stuff to see and read there. Like: + A naked woman in horns. + Genderfuckery galore. Half the time I have to examine the pictures before I can even take a guess as to who is what gender. When viewing an older picture I literally murmured aloud, "Okay, who does the penis belong to......?" + Gorgeous erotica. (Personally, I love the kind that doesn't necessarily show a lot, you know? You can do so much with so little. I mean, look at that picture. I am. :)) + A daily dose of awwwww. They look so sweet! + Body positivity. + Funny cartoons. + Whatever the hell is going on here. + I almost feel bad looking at this one. It seems so private. + This dude (SFW) has to be one of the most conventionally masculine-looking FTM transmen that I have ever seen in my life. DAMN. I'd expect to see that guy sauntering out of an Abercrombie and Fitch ad, or maybe moving through the pot haze of a frat party with a red plastic cup of beer in hand. ALSO, HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT. I don't know whether to be terrified or turned on. Anyway, yeah. Go check it out. ETA: Ahahahahahaaaaa, I just ran across pictures that my college friend Kristen drew of her wife Kim. Hi, explicit Kim! I see you haven't changed! Hee. (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 8th, 2009
yourlibrarian	4:10p	Icons, and Social Programming 1) ICONS! On DW: "You can now rename icon keywords and the comments that use that icon will continue to use it -- it will no longer revert to default." One of the main reasons people need more icon space is so that their old icons don't disappear if they want to add new ones. This is a much needed, great new feature. (There are some nice new features for community maintainers too). Also, DW is running a poll asking people how many icon slots they would like to see offered in the future, so if this matters to you, go vote. Plus, there is another poll about whether you would like to be able to "retire" icons from your icon page. This means that the icons will remain attached to their old appearances in posts and comments, but you won't have them currently available for use, and thus won't have to sort through them on your icon page when you're looking through the batch of icons you currently are actively using. Just as an aside, it's pretty nifty to have new options spring out of current discussions so quickly. There is a major personal touch in the way DW is run. 2) Reading this Sequential Tart posting that asked "Are Dolls at all culpable for crimes committed by imprints? Do we ever really stop being ourselves? Do our selves really exist at all?" made me think of the latest Castle episode. About partway through I asked Mike, "Doesn't this make you think of Dollhouse?" all the more so due to Marc Blucas' being a guest star. Then, too, the "ice holes" made me think of Stephen Colbert. 3) Speaking of that Sequential Tarts post, there was this line: "As Topher pointed out to Boyd …we're programmed every day, by the media and by our social interactions; does it really matter how the programming is done?" ( Read more... ) (Comment on this)
musesfool	10:22a	my cup's already overfilled Big Bang Theory Sheldon! ♥ ( spoilers ) * Castle ( spoilers ) * Hopefully today will be less fraught and crazy-making than yesterday was, and I will be able to get some work done on my yuletide story. I am worried I won't live up to the source, but then I think, in some ways, who could? Which will make more sense once I can talk about it. * LJ, please to be fixing comment notifications ASAP. It is really freaking irritating that I'm still not getting any. * Lastly, thank you again for all the lovely snowflakes. I wasn't able to get to everyone before they shut it down, but if I could have, I would have. *heart* * This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/104195.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: awake Current Music: Hunger Strike - Temple of the Dog (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, December 7th, 2009
stele3	1:31p	An open letter to Jennifer Vanasco, editor-in-chief of 365gay.com Dear Jennifer, I read your recent Huffington Post article ("How Adam Lambert Is Hurting Gay Marriage") with varying degrees of frustration and horror. First of all, I find it very telling that your title focuses so exclusively on gay marriage. I guess it shouldn't be surprising: when I recently came out to a coworker she rushed to assure me that she supported gay marriage. To which I wanted to respond, "....so?" I have no desire to ever get married; yet my identity has become synonymous with that struggle...in fact, gay marriage has come to dominate any discussion of gay rights. I use "gay" here in its proper definition -- i.e. "same-sex, esp. men" - because that is exactly what gay rights has become: upper-class, white gay men and lesbians determined to make their lives exactly like those of heterosexual people. We have seen the Holy Grail, and it's a white picket fence with a house, two parents, and 2.5 children. The perfect nuclear family, modified only slightly, just a little bit, pretty please. Who could ask for anything more? No one, according to you. And here I thought we were supposed to be fighting repression, not perpetuating the practice. Which is not to say that I am against same-sex marriage -- just against the idea that it's the only dream worth aspiring to, and that a pseudo-heterosexual lifestyle should somehow be my ideal, too. Two friends of mine, lesbians, got married during that brief, precious window of opportunity in California. They had a full ceremony, one of them changed her last name, the whole works. Oh, how lovely, you'd probably croon, and put them up on a kid-friendly slideshow to show mainstream America how nice and friendly the Gays really are, how we really want to be just like them. Except, my friends were and continue to be in an open relationship, and are into the kind of scene that revels in leashes and crawling around onstage. That is the kind of marriage that makes them happy. It works for them. It's very clear which part of their marriage is palatable to mainstream America, and to you. You remind me of Frank Kameny, the gay rights activist who organized marches in the 60's. He's inarguably a pioneer; he also forced women to wear skirts, men to wear suits and ties during the marches and wouldn't allow same-sex handholding. When two women attempted to do so, he immediately broke them up saying, "None of that!" You and Kameny are both so focused on achieving the same rights as the heterosexual majority that you have adopted their tactics, too -- censorship and moral panic. Oh my god, Adam Lambert is destroying the moral fabric of America the gay community. It was the drag queens and hustlers at Stonewall, Jennifer. And it was the drag queens and hustlers who were very quickly edged out of the mainstream gay rights movement by people like Kameny because they were too gauche, too gaudy, too sexual. Sound familiar? Yes, Adam Lambert got up in front of millions of Americans and dared to openly express his sexuality; it's a sexuality that includes BDSM tones, as anyone who's seen him perform or read his interviews will know. You rushed to side with the FCC and wag your finger at him, because that's what you really want: to be part of that big happy majority and never mind what parts of your identity or community you have to repress or screen in order to make all gays seem non-threatening (acceptable, apologetic). Newsflash: if we all behaved in a way that wouldn't shock or upset mainstream American culture, none of us would be queer. And I use "queer" in its adopted definition, meaning "all of us." The married lesbians who enjoy flogging. The transman wrestling with the start of his transition and being told by his LGBT college class that chromosomes are the sole determinant of gender. The asexual currently glaring at her computer screen as she types furiously away. The glam rocker who put on a performance no more salacious than those of his straight peers. We are a far more varied community than just "gay," and no, not all of us want that white picket fence. Jumping on a high horse to condemn how anyone in our community expresses their sexuality (within the legal and moral confines of consent) is the kind of thing best left to Jerry Falwell, whose foundation Liberty Counsel has rushed to condemn Adam Lambert as well. You're on the same side as Jerry Falwell right now, Jennifer. Well done. Adam Lambert might indeed be hurting the picture of The Harmless Gays Who Just Want To Live Like Regular Folks that you're so desperately propping up, but you are hurting the queer community. But you don't care. You want to live in your pretty glass house with all the trappings of a heterosexual life, but with a chewy gay center that is properly tucked away so as not to shock the neighbors. So you go on Huffington Post and you decry a man for openly expressing his sexuality, calling it thoughtless, degrading, and dishonorable. I know a word just as dirty as "dishonor," Jennifer, and twice as damning: sellout. Regards, A Queer Woman (29 Comments |Comment on this)
musesfool	11:18a	the solemnity of things left to themselves Thank you so much to ingridmatthews, spectralbovine, tygress girlmostlikely, tartanshell, midnitemaraud_r, devildoll, and also to the anonymice for the snowflake cookies! ♥♥♥♥♥ *twirls you all* [eta] Thanks also to the folks at crack_impala for the snowflake they sent to unfitforsociety. *g* [/eta] I have been very meh recently and now I feel all warm and loved. I've fallen behind completely on answering comments, so I am declaring today comment amnesty day, and getting rid of all the unanswered comments (on anything but fic - those I will try to answer) from before today. I have three sets of minutes to write now, plus yuletide and broken toys. Yay? Have a poem: Rhymes and Songs It's late now, December, a few trees continue translating. A menorah holds up its little buckets of light. An old woman with hands to her ears, two homeless men discussing the nature of evil. It's a clear morning. Everyone's carrying luggage. There're gaps between passersby, larger than usual. The sun sets silver shields in a row of window frames, all but one, where a girl in a fur hat looks out. Dawn riddled with memories fading and dispersing among the trees, fever subsiding — you think, at last I can do what I want, but mostly you're building on the silence, the solemnity of things left to themselves. White limousine at the corner: an intricate, depressed millionaire trolling for a girl so beautiful & frightened she might be enticed. And a new life, arduous and dire, commences. Years on a backcountry farm near one of the Great Lakes, a bent for poetry, little rhymes & songs to soothe yourself and children you've come to know. ~Charlie Smith ~*~ This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/104108.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: loved Current Music: 32 Flavors - Ani DiFranco (Comment on this)
Sunday, December 6th, 2009
poisontaster	10:30p	Oh Lana Turner We Love You Get Up Back from Chicago. I'm doing okay. I already did the RL quasi-update elsewhere, but I wanted to thank everyone for the lovely snowflakes and other virtual gifts, for your emails and texts and PMs and phone calls, for your patience, your sympathy and your love. I spent a good portion of my life exercising really poor decision making in my friends and other loved ones and I am still constantly bemused and grateful for ending up here, with the finest people of whom I ever dreamed. Thank you. I couldn't find it in myself to do much in Chicago; I didn't really read or watch TV and I had internet access only infrequently, so fannishly, I'm really far behind. Other than that brief, indulgent foray into Criminal Minds fandom, I haven't written a damn thing. Which probably means it was a good thing I dropped out of yuletide (and many thanks to elynross for being so incredibly understanding!) That's not an apology, it's just the facts. I don't feel bad about it, but I keep poking at that place, that squishy little gland of squee and interest, seeing if I can make it wake up again. I know it'll come--hell, the CM ficlet was only after a week, right?--but y'all know how impatient I am. And all the things that I can never just come out and say, all the things I can't process in other ways, always come out in my writing. So. That happened. Current Mood: calm (1 Comment |Comment on this)
poisontaster	10:30p	Oh Lana Turner We Love You Get Up Back from Chicago. I'm doing okay. I already did the RL quasi-update elsewhere, but I wanted to thank everyone for the lovely snowflakes and other virtual gifts, for your emails and texts and PMs and phone calls, for your patience, your sympathy and your love. I spent a good portion of my life exercising really poor decision making in my friends and other loved ones and I am still constantly bemused and grateful for ending up here, with the finest people of whom I ever dreamed. Thank you. I couldn't find it in myself to do much in Chicago; I didn't really read or watch TV and I had internet access only infrequently, so fannishly, I'm really far behind. Other than that brief, indulgent foray into Criminal Minds fandom, I haven't written a damn thing. Which probably means it was a good thing I dropped out of yuletide (and many thanks to elynross for being so incredibly understanding!) That's not an apology, it's just the facts. I don't feel bad about it, but I keep poking at that place, that squishy little gland of squee and interest, seeing if I can make it wake up again. I know it'll come--hell, the CM ficlet was only after a week, right?--but y'all know how impatient I am. And all the things that I can never just come out and say, all the things I can't process in other ways, always come out in my writing. So. That happened. Current Mood: calm (Comment on this)
musesfool	9:03p	swinging to the right side Thank you to deirdre_c, marciaelena, catdancerz and dotfic for the lovely snowflakes in my userinfo! ♥♥♥♥♥ * LJ, let my comments go! *shakes tiny ineffectual fist* * \o/ Giants beat the Cowboys! That always makes for a great Sunday. And they swept them this year, so I think that means they have the upper hand should it come down to a tiebreaker. * After brunch, I went to Supercuts and while she was cutting my hair, the hairdresser quizzed me on 19th c. novels like Wuthering Heights and Pride and Prejudice (well, technically movies adapted from 19th c. novels). I thought she said she'd read Jane Eyre, so I kind of spoiled it for her (crazy wife in the attic omg!) but she didn't seem to care. She said she was going to bump it up on her Netflix list, 'cause she likes the creepy ones. Generally, I hate having to chat while having my hair done, but this conversation was amusing and also about something I am familiar with, which is not usually the case. Also, she washed my hair with this lavender and mint shampoo that I really liked so I ended up buying it. Obviously, the way to upsell me is with conversation about books and things that smell nice. * I have a whopping 71 words on my yuletide story. Wah! Also, I am trying to figure out how I am going to find a beta who knows the source, because I'd like someone who is at least familiar with it to read the thing over when I finally finish it. When that's done, I can focus on Broken Toys, among other things. I think I know what I'm writing for that, but writing it in my current unable to write state should be interesting. Stupid writing. Why so hard? * This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/103705.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: mellow Current Music: Vikings v. Cardinals on tv (Comment on this)
musesfool	11:13a	i don't care if all of our steps come out wrong Two thumbs up for both the flourless chocolate cake, which tastes like a really intense fudge brownie, and the Sicilian cheesecake, which is just yummy, with a hint of orange flavor (I wonder if adding almond extract would work. hmm...). *** Here is some music I uploaded. The theme was "songs to wake up to" and I did two small sets: for when you need to ease into the day with some softness: For No One - Azure Ray Raining in Athens - Azure Ray The Shape I Found You In - Girlyman You Will Rise - Tom McRae Anna Begins - Counting Crows for when you need to get the adrenaline going: Every You Every Me - Placebo Back in Black - AC/DC Wherever I May Roam - Metallica One Girl Revolution (Battle Mix) - Superchick Slow Down Gandhi - Sage Francis I uploaded this for angelgazing, because it is THE Remus Lupin theme song (pre-Azkaban, anyway) in my head: There Is a Boy Who Never Goes Out - the Lucksmiths And here are some songs I was thinking should be SPN vids: Rise Up in the Dirt - Voxtrot Sam and Dean, saving people! hunting things! the family business! Red Shoes (The Angels Wanna Wear My) - Elvis Costello Sam and Dean v. angels (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love and Understanding - Elvis Costello Down In It - Nine Inch Nails Terrible Lie - Nine Inch Nails Sam wondering how things got all fucked up, and if it's even possible to fix them. *** Now I have to go get ready to meet fleurdeleo for brunch. And then another day of not-writing my yuletide story! Woo! *** This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/103496.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: busy Current Music: And We'll Dance - Thea Gilmore (Comment on this)
Saturday, December 5th, 2009
elisi	10:56p	*grumbles* Blimey LJ is being wonky tonight. Guess that means I ought to go to bed... (Also the title of this journal is proving very apt at the moment! *g*) Current Mood: sleepy (Comment on this)
musesfool	4:38p	you feed my flow and you flood my brain Thank you for the snowflake cookie, O anonymous benefactor! ♥ It really perked me up. Today was the bi-annual semiannual twice-yearly scrubbing of the tub. Oy. Scrubbing the tub is my least favorite chore ever. I will say that Soft Scrub with bleach is amazing - it totally got out a stain I thought would never come out. So now I have a clean tub, with a new bathmat and shower curtain, and the rest of the bathroom is clean as well. Lovely. Then I ran out to buy a couple of things I needed for today's bake-fest, and now the flourless chocolate cake is in the oven, and I am resting up before I start on the Sicilian cheesecake. We're having this potluck luncheon thingy at work this week, and I said I'd bring something dessert-ish, but I didn't want to bring something I hadn't tested, and my mother couldn't find her Italian cheesecake recipe, so I am taste testing. Well, I will be giving half of each cake to fleurdeleo when I see her tomorrow (and a bag of frozen blueberry boy bait cupcakes, as well), because too much is too much. And then when I've decided which I like better, I will make it later in the week to bring to work. The flourless chocolate cake was pretty easy, though I was worried I was going to overcook the chocolate because the butter wasn't melting quickly enough (I did it in a makeshift double-boiler - i.e., smaller pot floating on top of larger pot). And I had an unfortunate experience with having to fish out a bit of eggshell (so really, that should be an unfortunate eggsperience. I'm sorry! I can't help it! Bad puns just happen to me!) from the batter, but overall, it was pretty easy. It's got about twenty-five minutes to go and it smells divine. If it tastes as good as it smells, I think I know what I'm giving my sister and b-i-l for Christmas. (I am thinking homemade baked goods for all the adults, since I've been doing all this baking. That's good, right? It's fairly cheap, compared to what I normally spend, I enjoy doing it, and it tastes good. I just... I don't know how it will be received.) Both recipes call for a springform pan, which I did not own, so last night on the way home I stopped off at K-Mart on Astor Place, and got one (and also a bundt pan and a tube pan, and the new shower curtain and new bathmat, plus a new toothbrush holder - it has a pretty purple flower on it, and I liked it, even though my bathroom is all green), and man, let me tell you, that is one depressing department store. It reminded me a little of the ABC on Liberty Avenue back in City Line or the TSS on Metropolitan Avenue (man, that was a long time ago). Okay, maybe with slightly higher quality goods, but not by much. I don't know. Something about it was just depressing. So I've cleaned, shopped and baked, and talked to my parents on the phone. I ... I suppose I should write something now. I haven't in days. I mean, I have an opening sentence for yuletide, and I like my idea, but I just feel completely useless as a writer right now. I can't seem to write the kinds of stories I keep having ideas for (i.e., stories with casefile-y or caper-y plots) and it just makes me want to give up the whole enterprise. Meh. At least with baking I get the satisfaction of tasty baked goods at the end of the process. Right now, writing isn't providing much of that. I should have a baking icon. Hmm... *** This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/103408.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: productive Current Music: One Love - Stone Roses (Comment on this)
Friday, December 4th, 2009
musesfool	11:26p	suspended in my masquerade So it was a year ago today that I was laid off from Big Evol MegaCorp. I kind of can't believe it. I mean, a year. 12 months. 365 days. It's kind of boggling. I look back on it and I'm like, wow, what did I even do for those twelve weeks? If only I'd known things would work out pretty quickly, I would have enjoyed the time off a lot more, I tell you what. I know I was lucky - I am lucky. One of the VPs I worked for at BEMC is still out of work. It helps that I wasn't tied to the financial industry, and that I actively wanted to get back into the non-profit sector. And that I'm kind of an awesome assistant. I opened this post at about 1 pm this afternoon at work and never figured out what exactly I wanted to say. That I'm grateful, I suppose, that I was only out of work for three months, that I have a family who could have taken me in if the need arose, that I got a decent severance package that also continued my insurance for those twelve weeks (and would have paid half of it for another twelve if I'd needed to go on COBRA) that I found a job so quickly in a bad economy at a place where I don't feel like I'm selling a little bit of my soul every time it's mentioned on the news. (Er, not that the place I work now is ever mentioned on the news, but you know what I mean.) Anyway, I never did cry about it, possibly because I was afraid if I started, I would never stop, but it still hits me at odd moments, and it's made me even more anxious than I was before (which is really saying something, because I am like a ball of anxiety slathered in neuroses) about not screwing up at work, about how close I am - how close most of us are - to one or two bad breaks leading to a whole lot of badness, and how there's very little in the way of a safety net for anyone (who doesn't work for Goldman Sachs) anymore. What I did cry about today - and oh man, did I ever - was this week's Friday Night Lights. How is this show so good? HOW? ( spoilers ) * I watched this week's Bones earlier, and wow, really unpleasant movie-whoring. Bleh. And then there was the White Collar fall finale. ( spoilers ) I can't wait for hiatus to be over. I am also kind of geeked by the Burn Notice commercials. And how AWESOME is that Psych commercial? SO AWESOME OMG! GUS & SHAWN! HALL & OATES! *hearts* TV is so very, very good to me. *happy sigh* * This entry at DW: http://musesfool.dreamwidth.org/103007.html. people have commented there. Current Mood: impressed Current Music: when they said sit down, i stood up (1 Comment |Comment on this)
poisontaster	1:10p	Fic: And The Wisdom To Know Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid Rating: Adult Warnings: None. Spoilers: For 5.09 "100". Word Count: 1,631 AN: Er. Just something random I wrote. ( What were they? ) Current Mood: calm (Comment on this)
poisontaster	1:10p	Fic: And The Wisdom To Know Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid Rating: Adult Warnings: None. Spoilers: For 5.09 "100". Word Count: 1,631 AN: Er. Just something random I wrote. ( What were they? ) Current Mood: calm (Comment on this)

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